a little late

I am finally getting around to posting these pictures from before Christmas.  My two sister's and I hired an amazing photographer to try and capture these 7 wonderful grandkids.  The photoshoot and pictures were a surprise christmas gift for my parents and grandparents.  It was quite the ordeal to not only keep the photo shoot a secret but also the pictures, proofs, and photobook that we gave for the gift! Whew, we did it, everyone loved it, and here are a few of my favorites!  Thank you so much to Erin for putting up with all of these kiddos and pulling off an amazing shoot! (minus the drama of Jackson falling into the swamp)

guess who's here?

It's the dead of winter which means gramma Jeanne is here!! My dad's mom lives in upstate New York and has gotten used to spending the winter month's here in Louisiana.  She warms up and waits til spring to head back up North when there is no snow to shovel or ice to defrost (or fall on)!  The boys absolutely LOVE having great-gramma here.  She reads, tells stories, and just enjoys hanging out with all of the grankids!  We are blessed with time to visit now to make up for being military and living all over the country when we were growing up and not seeing her very much.  We all love having gramma Jeanne here and look forward to lots of wonderful memories together!

cool websites

check out my cousin's blog and business website for COOL stuff!

www.osewprecious.blogspot.com

www.sodderbug.com

patience

my head is going to explode. i can't stop thinking. i literally have a throbbing headache. i have gone in so many circles and back again, i don't know which way is up.  how is it that one decision can be so earthshaking...mind blowing...time consuming...utterly exhausting.  Family of 4?5?more?less?  heaven please help me because i am going crazy.  will the desire for another baby ever go away? will i have this same feeling IF i have another one? will there always be a maternal need to say what if? just one more? i've totally overwhelmed myself with the pros and cons lists.  i can convince myself either way one minute and change my mind the very next.  the decision to expand our family is very complex. ttc vs. adopt. if we ttc, can we expect God to bless us with another miracle? do i take my 2 miracles and just be grateful. do i swallow the lump in my throat and the knot in my stomach and say yes to adopt like my husband wants and just hope that i will "feel" it as the process progresses?  i have prayed for countless hours for God to reveal himself.  in the quiet, i hear nothing. in the stillness, i feel alone. in my patience there is a longing that grows ever deeper. as i search for resolution, i struggle to figure out what God needs me to know, to hear. my soul searching has left me with no anwers yet, but i am hopeful. now if i could just turn off my heart, my mind, and rest........

My Heart Smiles!

my precious boys
check out the link to see new bible verse video!

400

When I met my husband, I knew he was smart, talented, funny, and definately good looking. He had so many of the qualities I had prayed for in a mate. One thing I did not know about my husband, however, was that he was an extremely talented writer. He started writing letters to the editor in college and even had one published in a local paper.  His knack for writing also helped him in school.  When he announced about 2 years ago that he was going to write a book, I shrugged.  (note to wives: be your husband's cheerleader.  I feel terrible that I initially didn't have the faith or encouragment to believe he could do it and have it be successful.)  As he came home, day after day, with note scribbled on any paper he could find or literally written up his arms at work, I wondered just what kind of book he was putting together and how it would be.  Selfishly I grew tired of the endless hours he spent upstairs in the office, writing, re-writing, editing, proofing, and ultimately pouring his heart and soul into a book.  Eventually as I started to read and listen to what he was working on, I was amazed, humbled, and awe struck.  My husband has an amazing way with words (ON A PAGE), and I could not believe that what he had written was so good. 

He is a CRNA, (certified registered nurse anesthetist) and his book is about anesthesia.  It tells stories of what he learned, the hard way, as he navigated his masters program at KU Med and what he has learned in the real world of the operating room thus far in his career. It is geared towards helping anesthesia students transition from school to the OR.  I am so proud and amazed at what he has accomplished!

All this to be said, today was a huge day.  After self-publishing and spending no money on advertising, my husband sold his 400th book today!!!!  They are sold soley through his website and word of mouth.  It is such a good feeling to know that so many people can relate or have found humor and help in the 85,000 words he has penned.  We are nearing the  bottom of the pile of the books we initially ordered and a new order of books was needed.  So my husband got to work again and has successfully updated and submitted his 2nd edition of the book, to be published and released this spring!!!!  Words cannot express my awe at the goal my husband had and the patience he had to see it through to the end. I am so proud.  Proud that he is my husband.  Proud that he is so smart.  Proud that he has risen above so many things and has used his talents to help others in their career in the anesthesia world.

John, you are amazing and brilliant and I love you.  Here's to the 400th book and countless more to come in the future!! God is awesome and I am so glad we are on this journey together!!!

Check out his website on my sidebar or the link below to see an exerpt of his book!


http://www.johnmarblecrna.com/

wordless wednesday

It's a happy day!

Okay, so you know how you get crazy things stuck in our head sometimes?? Maybe like singing "pants on the ground" 100 times! (american idol joke for those of you who don't know)  Well, I woke up this morning with a song in my head that I haven't heard in years.  It's one of those kids songs from sunday school.  I smile as I think about the words and what they mean for me today.  Thank you Jesus, for even showing up in the small ways.  I will leave you with the lyrics and you will be grateful that I'm not subjecting you to the tune!!

It's a happy day, and I thank God for the weather,

It's a happy day, and I'm livin' it for my Lord.

It's a happy day, and things are gonna get better,

'cause I'm livin' each day by the promises in God's word.

Simple, sweet, words of wisdom for this dreary and gloomy Louisiana wednesday. Thank you Jesus!

monday again

Really wishing I could shake these blah's.  I'm happy and thankful but just can't get out of this funk. My house has fallen apart and I have no desire or motivation to put it all back together again.  Laundry is going to take over and my hubby is going to have to run out of patience sooner or later.  I went running today for the first time in over a week after all our illnesses and hurt my knee.  As I sit here and type it is throbbing and I'm totally bummed that my training for the 1/2 marathon could be all for nothing.  I have a million things to get done on my list and don't even know where to start.  Just put Lion King on for the boys (they are watching it for the first time even and are mesmorized) So I have an hour right now to get something done...and here I sit. BLAH.  Can't stop thinking about Haiti.  So sad.  Need a date night with the hubby.  Still think about wanting another baby every single waking minute of every single day.  Have never prayed so hard, for so long, about anything and not heard ANYTHING from God.  I know that means his answer is "just wait" for right now.  I've been patient for 14 months now with this crazy desire to have another baby.  A lot would have to change and happen for it all to work out.  Feeling a little better writing it all out.  Going to try to tackle one room at a time!  Maybe Sarah's great clean out and decrapification will inspire me from over at the Thrify Chic!  Check out her button on my side bar.  Happy Monday and hope you all have a great week.

TWO WORDS

GO SAINTS!!!!!!!

Out of this world...

So I just realized that I haven't uploaded pictures from my camera in almost a month.  Life has been busy and I just haven't.  I need to do better, especially considering my goal of wanting to scrapbook and stay on top of things this year.  I had to post some of these pictures from jackson's school project this week.  He was SO proud and did a wonderful job.  Although I am starting to worry about my OCD kindergartener who is quite the perfectionist.  This project took all week and a total of about 6 hours.  He colored and colored and colored.  He wanted everything to be perfect.  Yikes! (didn't get that from me)  Anyway, here is his Solar System project!!!

Show us your life friday...

I LOVE to eat. EAting is pretty much one of my most favorite things to do. I don't cook a whole lot so we eat out quite a bit. That could really pose a problem if I didn't add a little exercise in there somewhere!

Today over on Kelly's blog
she is linking up to ways to lose weight and diet.
I have found life without eating my favorite foods just isn't worth it. So I eat a brownie on occasion, splurge at my monthly girl's night out, and never say no to chips and salsa at my fav mexican place. I have however added some exercise.

Now I am not a gym rat, nor do I even enjoy working out, but my whole perspective on exercise changed last summer. I was still carrying around 20 baby pound and my little one was 3 and I had to do something. So I set a goal!! Yep, picked something to work towards, that had a finish and I could feel accomplished at! I signed up for a sprint triathlon! Now some of you are like wait a second, that is crazy! Well, it was, a little, but so worth it! When I started "training" (and I use that word lightly) I couldn't even run for 2 minutes without stopping. I grabbed both sisters and a bunch of friends and we all made baby steps together. We swam, biked, and ran our way to being fit, happy moms and dropped some weight in the process. At the end of our 12 weeks we competed in our very first sprint triathlon and it was a fabulous sense of accomplishment!!! I plan on doing it again this summer. But first, I've lost my mind and with the help of my addiction to The BIggest Loser, I've signed up for a 1/2 marathon for february! Yep, totally crazy, but a goal to reach for non the less! I'm excited but way behind on my milage for running and will probaby be walking a lot of it. But I'm enjoying the exercise, again with sisters and friends, and still eating what I love (in moderation) and maintaining a somewhat reasonable weight. So there you have it! NOthing scientific, but what has worked for me!

Happy 101

Wow, I can't believe I was actually tagged/selected for my first blog award EVER!!!! Thank you much to Rachel who mentioned me as a blogger she is happy to read about.  I am flattered and honored to have found a friend in cyperspace.  It is so amazing that there are so many people we can share with, pray for, and learn from and never have met face to face.  Jump over to her blog to check out who she was nominated from and read her happy list!!!!  Here is what the award rules were!

 List 10 things that make you happy, and try to do at least one of them today.

        Tag 10 bloggers that brighten your day.

If you are of of those 10 lucky (happy) bloggers who get the award, link back to my blog and create your happy list!

1. My miracle boys
2. My amazing husband
3. My fabulous parents
4. My beautiful sisters who are also my friends
5. Diet Coke
6. Sunshine
7. The beach
8. Mexcian food
9. Worship
10.Gardening

10 blogger/friends

1. Becky
2. Darcy
3. John
4.Kristina
5.Erin
6.Katie
7.Amie
8.Rachel
9.Angie
10.Kelly

Whew! Have fun and happy blogging!

can't shake 'em

just trying to shake another day of the blahs...

Monday monday

I am attempting to join the land of the living today.  Mustered up enough energy to bring the boys to school and stop at walgreens for some gatorade and crackers.  Last week Logan had a terrible stomach virus...he so kindly shared with me.  Saturday night I started throwing up and couldn't stop.  I seriously thought I was going to die.  My fabulous hubby is a CRNA and kicks into medical mode when I get sick (so sweet).  He was able to give me some IV fluids at home after nearly passing out from dehydration.  I slept all day yesterday and am attempting to get better today with hydrating and some food.  I don't know why it is our family is always sick and I'm really getting tired of it!  Hope you all had a better weekend than us! Happy monday.

NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS!

I know it's good to set goals, strive for improvement, aim for something higher.  I don't know why but I haven't really wanted to have resolutions this year for fear I may not acheive them.  I think back to last year and some were kept, some were not.  sigh. I don't know if life really is worth living without diet coke...kidding of course...kinda.  Anyway, here are a few things that have been on my heart as I look forward to 2010.  They may or may not be my official resolutions...that is such a strong word.

1.  As with every year, I would love to grown closer to my Jesus.  I already have 2 Bible studies I am planning on attending.  I have been having a hard time with taking that next step.  I have been saved all my life and have settled into a nice, happy, comfortable, christian walk.  Time to rev it up a little.

2. I would really like to be a more organized, more effective, and just plain fabulous house wife.  There is always more cleaning I should do, a little more effort I should make to keep this place running.

3. I signed up for a 1/2 marathon in February so I have to hit the pavement and get my back side in gear to give myself a shot a finishing it.  Only up to 7 miles on my runs so i have to crank it up, seriously.

4.  I have to get some scrapbooking done.  I made it through 2009 without scrapping a single page...sinful!! My poor 4 year old wants to know where his baby book is.  I failed miserable at project 365, but would still like to use the album to get my pictures organized and out where we can look through them instead of in boxes in a closet!

5. This last one for now is a hard one.  After experiencing much guilt I am admitting that as a mom, I have been losing my patience way too easily and raise my voice way too much.  Now granted, I am a passionate person who has a generally loud voice anyway, so raising it isn't all that much of a stretch.  But the boys (all 3 of them) will definately appreciate a kinder, gentler me who can abstain from yelling for no good reason.

Hope you all are off and running to a fabulous new year and may God bless you as this year gets fresh start!!

operation organization!

So the cold air has perked me up a bit! As the boys play nicely together, I am tackling a few projects!  The christmas decor is all put away in fabulous red and green rubbermaid bins.  This was my second year to phase ouy old cardboard boxes and switch over to these wonderful tubs that make my attic look almost inviting! Easy stacking and storing, easy finding what I need! I purchased some orange ones for fall and will move onto easter, mardi gras, and summer bins as the year progresses!!

So in the spirit of ringing in the new year with resolutions (which I have yet to make), I am going room to room and getting rid of stuff, organizing and giving everything a good cleaning!  Check with me in march to see how much I got done!! :)  Anyway, the boys room is well on it's way to becoming user friendly.  I will no longer have clean clothes piled up with no place to go because the last 4 hours has resulted in cleaned and thinned out dresser drawers and closet!  The boys share a room and I think that makes mine a challenge to fit 2 kids clothes in one dresser and closet.  I have also decided that it is a sin to have so many clothes for my kids! Bargain shopping and sale hunting has resulted in way too much stuff! 

I hope everyone is staying warm during this crazy artic blast! (and I'm in Louisiana!) Can you believe no school today for a "cold weather day" Oh well, my little one is slowly on the road to recovery and going to tackle another room during naps! 

blah...

spiritual warfare? unhealthy kids? just plain bad luck?...

who knows, all I know is I have had one hour of sleep after staying up all night with my precious logan who threw up until he couldn't even breathe.  Every 20 minutes, back to the bathroom for another round.  At 3 am it started coming out both ends and my poor logan couldn't even sit up he was so weak.  This rotavirus has a thing for my family and I'm so tired of it.  So much for getting immunity if you have it.  We have it at least twice a year, with both boys. sigh. 

I'm off to hold my baby.

welcome 2010

Wow, where has another week gone. We are 5 days into January and time has not slowed down at all for me to catch up.  I have gotten a few things done.  The pantry is organized! I finally called the fridge repair man and after 3 years of procrastinating, we now have ice!!! Yeah, no more filling those darn trays.  The awesome repair guy also fixed the water line that was apparently frozen solid and hasn't worked for 2 months! woohoo! And I have to say, I kinda miss the loud humming noise that I had grown so used to hearing.  Anyway, check that off my list of things to do! I also did 1 scrapbook page. Yes, I said ONE.  It's better than my 2009 average of 0!  I really need to catch up.  My poor baby who is now 4 wants to know where HIS baby book is! Yikes.  Christmas is almost taken down.  Slowly but surley everything is getting put into awesome red and green rubbermaids.  I started last year and the organizing continues as everything has a place and bin.  That almost makes me want to squeal.  Headed to Target in the morning to pick up a few more bins just to make sure I have enough!

I have been laying low on the posting here on my blog, but have been busy pouring my heart and soul into my prayer journal.  It is so wonderful to keep record of prayer requests, life events, things that are important so you can look back and see how God works and watch his plan unfold.  I pray for God's will in my life all the time, and sometimes that is a general, sweeping, generic, christian request that I selfishly pray.  This week it has been a detailed, specific, step by step, concious, prayer journal full of asking for guidance, peace, wisdom, understanding, and direction. 

2009 was a year filled with wants and desires for me.  I have wanted another baby for more than a year now and have a deep desire to carry another child.  As anyone knows, that decision takes 2 people! :)  I have prayed and waited patiently for God's will in our lives whether it be to have another child, adopt, or thank God for our 2 wonderful miracles and remain a blessed family of 4.  There are so many variables, so many pros and cons, so many what ifs, but my heart has kept tugging and I have felt as though our family is not complete.  My husband has prayed along side me but has been very vocal about us not trying to conceive again.  He is all for adopting, however, I have not felt the same peace about that.  So as 2010 rolls along at a pace I already can't keep up with, I will be praying harder than last year, listening a little more carefully, finding more time to be still and know my God, and continue to pray for His will in my life!  And when I'm not around for a little while, it's probably because I'm frantically writing in my prayer journal!!!