Resolutions!

So I wasn't going to make any, but my mind is swirling with all the things I want to do, so I figured I should probably just make the list and keep it to refer to this year. Goals are good. They help us to move forward. They give us a reason to try a little harder and aim a little higher. I don't want to be bored, or worse, boring. So here goes, 2009 here I come!

(in no particular order)

1. Exercise. Isn't that a given each year? I am hoping one day it will just become part of my life and maybe I will even enjoy it. Okay maybe not, but I owe it to my husband and kids to be healthy.

2. Maybe #1 will help me with my weigh loss resolution. The two seem to go hand in hand. I have got to get these last 15 pounds off. I don't think you're allowed to call it "baby weight" when the baby is 3!

3. Hide God's word in my heart. So I failed miserable with trying to memorize Psalm 139. Maybe I will try to start small. It has always bothered me that I have been a christian my whole life and am not more able to pray and recite scripture as much as I would like.

4. Scrapbook. I have thousands of pictures and even a scrapping nook, (thanks dad and hubby). Now I just have to use it!

5. Don't waste time. I find myself so frustrated that at the end of the day sometimes I have spun my wheels to exhaustion only to find I haven't accomplished a thing. I would like to become more efficient and learn how to manage my time wisely!

6. Turn the T.V. OFF!!! This is going to be a hard one. Not so much for me with an occasional show I watch, but the kids in front of the T.V. for hours has to go. Life is too short and too exciting to let NOGGIN teach them what they need to know. So here we go kids, let's play more, color more, get messy with finger paint more, get out the play doh, (even though I despise cleaning it up), and quite vegging out just for some "mommy time"!
crap, now it's in writing and I have to try to do it.

7. Be a Proverbs 31 wife. Self explainatory.

8. Be a good steward of the money my husband works hard to make and the Lord has blessed us with. Thank you, Dave Ramesey!

9. Laugh more!

10. Do one new thing this year. I would like to challenge myself to do one new thing. Maybe a hobby. Start some lessons. Go back to work occasionally. Volunteer for something. Just want to expand my horizons and not let life get boring.

So there's the top 10. Could keep going for days on all the things I want to change or do but those 10 will keep me busy for awhile!

Happy New Year!

almost there...

Wow, I can't believe 2009 is just around the corner! Where did that year go? As I look forward to another New Year, I am once again thinking about resolutions. Don't know that I truly want to make any this year since my track record for keeping them isn't good enough to even mention. What I have been pondering this week is what will the year ahead have in store for us. There are hopes, dreams, aspirations, thoughts of life changes, and anticipation for a fresh start. A chance, once again, to see January 1st and say, this is it. Now is the time. Let's not wait. Go for it, (what ever IT may be). So as this year comes to an end, I eagerly invite 2009 to start and with it, hope and dream about a year that will be full. Full of living, laughing, giving, hoping, sharing, hugging, loving, and so much more. Here's a cheers to 2009 and Happy New Year!

My sweet boys

The camera is always out at my house. Just wanted to post a few of my recent favorites to share. Hope everyone has a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!

Don't you just LOVE my new blog makeover from DANIELLE? Her link is below. Thank you danielle for fast and fabulous work!!!!

mouth of babes...

So we are in a regular bedtime routine. Bath, story, brush teeth, potty, daddy carries them to bed after 5 min of eenie, meenie, minee, moe, and then prayer time. We have taken the time to teach the boys the Lord's Prayer and it is so precious to hear my 3 and 4 year old say it. I wish i could spell the way my sweet, speech therapy attending, children say their prayer because it makes me smile every night. I have also been sharing with the boys that Jesus is always there for us and we can talk to Him about anything, anytime. Logan has now started conversational prayer and it humbles me to hear my three year old talk to Jesus about everything. This week has included, "thank you jesus for my presents that santa will bring, thank you for my christmas tree with the lights and ornaments that make me so happy, etc." Well last night was especially touching, insert sarcasm! My little logan rambled off the Lord's Prayer and then went into his thanks yous to jesus. It went something like this,
"dear Jesus, thank you for my mom and dad. thank you for granny and grandaddy. thank you for maw maw and papa, thank you for my mom and dad (yes, we got mentioned twice) and thank you for helping me to poop. thank you jesus for white medicine (desitin) that helps my bootie feel so much better and thank you for my wipes! In Jesus' name, AMEN"

Aww, out of the mouth of babes, huh?!
It's good to know Logan can bring anything to God and is truly grateful for even the little things in his life!

Christmas 2008

wouldn't you know that after months of trying to take christmas card pictures that were good, I got this one on a whim AFTER my cards were in the mail and delivered with a different picture.

Thankful...

So I'm sitting here writing this as the snow has just stopped, yes snow, in southeast louisiana. CRAZY! Anyway, the heater just kicked on and I'm drinking a nice hot cup of tea. It got me thinking about how grateful I am for everything. My heater, my house for that matter. Big things, little things. It reminded me of the sweet moments that my kidos have expressed gratitude for the things in their life. Over thanksgiving one morning jackson came up to me out of the blue and said, "mom, I'm thankful!" I was thrilled that he expressed that to me and I replied with, "that's great honey, what are you thankful for?" He paused in deep thought and proudly proclaimed, "FRUIT SNACKS!" I laughed out loud and said "that's great but what else, thinking there was a profound, deeper answer about to come out of his sweet lips. He then proceeded with all the things that make his life great. "cereal bars, red ones!, graham cracker sticks, and oranges!"

I marveled at how truly grateful jackson seemed over a few of his favorite things and that he had stopped to let me know that he was thankful for those things. I took the opportunity to talk to him about all of the blessings we have and that some people are less fortunate that us. We talked about how some little boys and girls don't have any toys to play with or shoes to wear. I made sure to explain to my precious 4 year old that we truly have an abundance and not everyone is so fortunate. We then talked about picking out some toys to give away to little boys and girls who need some. I spent the next week or so cleaning out the boys playroom with baby toys that they had outgrown or simply stopped playing with.

Last week I packed the boys up and told them we were going to go and give the toys to children who couldn't buy their own. They got so excited and jackson said, "can we give them to all the children of the world?!" I told him we would see what we could do. As we headed to the car, jackson said, "wait mommy, go get the red bin!" I was puzzled, all the toys were already in boxes in the back of the car. "What do you need?" I asked him trying to hurry him along. "My trains, my trains!" He was very concerned and ran to get his box of trains. Jackson is obsessed with trains. He plays with them for hours. In all my cleaning, I didn't even think to touch his trains because they are so special to him. "We don't need your trains, baby" I told him. "We already have the toys to give away in the car." As he frantically dug through his treasured trains, he pulled out one of his favorite and said, "how about this one?" He held up a bright yellow train. "we can give this one to all the children of the world!" He was so excited and his heart was in such a good place" I teared up and said, " baby, you don't have to give away your favorite train" "uh, huh, I do" he said proudly and off to the car he trotted. My heart was so touched with the willingness to give and unselfishness jackson displayed. I was humbled. Did my four year old just teach me something?!

So off we went to the crisis pregnancy center where we unloaded 4 boxes of toys. The boys were so excited that their toys were going to go help other children. Jackson only had one little disappointment when we got there. He thought we were going to meet ALL the children of the world at once. OOps.

So I end this post once again reflecting on all the things I have. My family, my friends, my salvation, my earthly possesions and the love of 2 sweet boys that keep me humble and happy every minute of everyday!

Like it was yesterday...

I remeber it like it was yesterday. The day I spoke with my OB-GYN on the phone and he said, "start saving your pennies for in-vitro, you aren't having any babies the old fashioned way!" Actually, it wasn't day, it was 2am. I was more than half way through a shift as a night labor and delivery nurse at the hospital I worked at in Kansas City. I had to call the doctor about a patient and it happened to also be MY doctor on call. He hadn't had time to go over test results with me during office hours and I guess he thought he was doing me a favor by filling me in on the phone while he was thinking of it. My whole world blurred around me. I couldn't think. I almost felt like I couldn't breath. Although 2 years into trying to concieve, we weren't in a huge hurry because I was working my husband through graduate school and we knew a baby would be hard. But all of a sudden, my hopes, my dreams for a family seemed to be shattered. In one sentence my whole future had become question marks. Will we be able to afford infertility treatments? Will they work? But I have always just wanted to be a mom! How can God do this to me? As I drove home from that shift, I didn't know what I was going to say to John, my husband. I thought my medical issues were to blame, but apparently we were both at the receiving end of news about why conceiving on our own would be close to impossible. I remember feeling cold, empty, nauseous. I was too stunned to cry until I crawled into bed. When the floodgates opened, I couldn't stop. I cried until the heaving and sobbing ended in exhaustion and was even too angry and confused to pray. When I told john, he too felt the loss in his heart. We held each other. We cried together. We hoped that the doctors were wrong and wondered where we would find strength to carry us through our disappointment and grief.

As mom's always do, my mom gave me the encouragement and advice that helped me through the next weeks and months. She reminded me that God is big enough and could give me the desire of my heart. Through doctors appointments listening about our options and trying to get john through school, I started laying my requests at the Heavenly Father's feet. (as did so many other wonderful friends and family) I held on to my favorite bible verse; "trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths" Proverbs 3:5-6 gave me peace and a promise that I clung to.

I don't remember the date right now but will have to go back and look on my calendar that I saved from 2003. I do however remember the walk to the mailbox the day I got my paper work in the mail for our in-vitro payment options. To make a long and emotional story a bit shorter I will summarize: I opened the letter from the doctors office, cried all the way to the trash can, and threw it away because that had been the very same day I had a positive pregnancy test with our first miracle!!

My First Blog

So I am somewhat computer savy, but have never blogged before. I spend so much time reading some wonderful blogs that I was inspired to start writing. Actually, I want to start writing because with each day that passes, my boys grow up a little bit more and I don't want to forget all the wonderful little things that make each day with them such a blessing. Like today at lunch, Jackson leaned over to my mom and said, "hey gramma, I want to listen on your cheek!" My mom looked at me, puzzled. I knew exactly what he meant. I am his mom, I always know. "He wants to tell you a secret," duh, I am thinking to myself. But that is one of the little quirks that is Jackson. My sweet little boy with an expressive language delay that makes him so adorable my heart flutters to think of all the sentences he has botched. I don't care that he gets his subject and verb a little fumbled, or that when he says "my tummies are empty" he is simple stating he's hungry. These are the things I never want to forget. The stories that make my life as a stay at home mom so rewarding. I will chronicle past events too, just to keep everyone up to speed on our two miracles that are Jackson and Logan. My 2 precious blessings sent straight from heaven and are now bringing me and my husband so much joy! So here it is, my blog about my sweet marbles from heaven!